Friday, July 31, 2009


Share |


A beautiful girl ask you for lift,

On the way the girl become very sick.

You got TENSION !!

You came to hospital ,

Doctor told - "You are going to become father"

You got TENSION !!

You said - "I am not the father!"

The doctor asked the girl

She said - "You are the father of the child"

You got more TENSION.

Then doctor calls police and police arrives

Police force you for medical checkup

Report came.

"You can never be the father of the child"

You got more TENSION !!

Then also you thanked GOD and happily going back to home!

Then think on the way, If you can't become father then who is the father of your children????????

Share |

Monday, July 27, 2009

Teachers and Students Special !!

Share |

Teachers and Students Special !!
Teacher: What happened in 1869?
Student: Gandhi ji was born.

Teacher: What happened in 1873?
Student: Gandhiji was four years old.

Question: What is the full form of math?
Answer: Mentally affected teachers harassing students

Teacher: Now children, if I saw a man beating a donkey and stopped him then what virtue would I be showing?

Teacher: Because of Gandhiji's hard work what do we get on 15th August.
Student: A holiday

Teacher: Tomorrow there will be a lecture on Sun. everyone must attend it.
Raju:No ma'm! I will not be able to attend it.
Teacher: Why?
Raju: My mother will not allow me to go so far!!!

Teacher:"Can anyone give me an example of Coincidence?"
Johnny :"Sir, my mother and father got married on the same day same time."

Teacher: How old is ur father.
Sunny:As old as I am.
Teacher:How is it possible?
Sunny: He became father only after I was born.

Teacher:"What is your name?".
Student:"Mera naam Suraj Prakash hai."
Teacher:"When I ask a question in english,answer it in english."
Student: "My name is Sunlight."

F UN!!!! :-)))))
A guy, sitting outside his home about to be evicted from his house, was contemplating how the future would be after he had divorced his wife, lost his children and lost his job...

He notices a crate of beer bottles and walks up to it.

He takes out an empty bottle, smashing it into the concrete wall swearing, "You are the reason I don't have a wife", second bottle, "You are the reason I don't have my children", third bottle "You are the reason I lost my job".

He notices the fourth bottle is sealed and still full of beer. He takes the bottle, puts it aside and says "Stand aside my dear friend; I know you were not involved".

Share |

Scientists PJ

Share |

1. Once all the scientists die and go to
heaven............ They decide
to play hide-n-seek.........Unfortunately Einstein is the one who has
the den...........He is supposed to count up to 100...and then start

Everyone starts hiding except Newton .........
Newton just draws a square of 1 meter and stands in it right in front of


Einstein's counting
1,2,3......97,98,99.....100... ..... He opens his eyes and finds Newton
standing in front........

Einstein says "newton's out..newton's....out....."
Newton denies and says i am not out........
He claims that he is not Newton ......

All the scientists come out to see how he proves that he is not Newton
Newton says "I am standing in a square of area 1m squared..... That
makes me Newton per meter squared...... since one Newton per meter
squared is one Pascal, I'm Pascal, Therefore Pascal is OUT...........!

2. All electrons were having a party but protons attacked them.

A hero comes and saves them.

All electrons ask him "Who are you?"

He Says




"My name is BOND .... COVALENT BOND"

3. Once 'Constant' and e^x ( e raised to x) were walking down the
Suddenly 'Constant' screamed and said:
"I m going bcoz 'Differential' is coming and if he sees me he will
eliminate me."
But e^x stands firm in front of ' Differential' and says:
"U can't do anything with me. I m e^x and will always be e^x."
'Differential starts laughing??..


Socho ...............
Socho ...............

Differential says: " I m not d/dx, I m d/dy."

Share |

Wednesday, July 22, 2009

How to test intelligent people

Share |

While visiting India, George Bush is invited to tea with Abdul Kalam.

He asks Kalam what his leadership philosophy is.
He says that, it is to surround himself with
intelligent people.

Bush asks how he knows if they're intelligent.

"I do so by asking them the right questions," says
Kalam. "Allow me to demonstrate."

Bush watches as Kalam phones Manmohan Singh and says,

"Mr. Prime Minister, please answer this question:
Your mother has a child, and your father has a child,
and this child is not your brother or sister. Who is it?"

Manmohan immediately responds,
"It's me, Sir !"

"Correct. Thank you and good-bye" says Kalam. He hangs
up and says," Did you get that, Mr. Bush?"

Bush nods: "Yes Mr. President. Thanks a lot.

I'll definitely be using that!"

Bush, upon returning to Washington, decides
he'd better put Condoleezza Rice to the test.
Bush summons her to the White House and says,
"Condoleezza, I wonder if you can answer a question for me."

"Why, of course, sir. What's on your mind?"

Bush poses the question: "Uhh, your mother has a
child, and your father has a child, and this child is not
your brother or your sister. Who is it?"

Rice was puzzled and finally asks, "Can I think about
it and get back to you?" Bush agrees, and Rice leaves.

Rice immediately calls a meeting of senior senators,
and they puzzle over the question for several hours,
but nobody can com e up with an answer.. Finally,
in desperation,
Rice calls

Colin Powell
and explains the problem.

"Mr. Powell, your mother has a child, and your father
has a child, and this child is not your brother or your sister.
Who is it?"

Powell answers immediately, "It's me, of course."

Much relieved, Rice rushes back to the White House,
finds George Bush, and exclaims,

"I know the answer, sir! I know
who it is!
It's our Colin Powell!"

And Bush replies in disgust, "Wrong,

it's Manmohan Singh!"

Share |

Monday, July 13, 2009


Share |

Share |

Friday, July 10, 2009

Character of a poltician

Share |


An important politician was seen moving around with a film actress for a couple of months, with whom he finally decided to plunge into matrimony.
But being cautious, he posing as an anonymous person, hired a private detective for the job of looking into her past and finding out if she had any previous affairs with any men.
After a few days, the politician at last received his detective’s report, which went like this:

With respect to your request, we did lot of inquiry and found that the lady has a spotless reputation.
Her past is clear, her family and friends all come from a very respectable background. No one has anything negative about her character.
But yes, as per my sources, for the last couple of months she’s been frequently seen flirting with a politician with a dubious reputation.

Share |


Share |


Do you know logic of emergency ambulance
services named 108??

Add Your birth year's last two digits with Your age

The sum Total should come to 108

try it,

Is it true?

Only a Mathematician Can elaborate.

This image has been resized. Click this bar to view the full image. The original image is sized 750x580.

Share |

Marriage Jokes / Fun

Share |

Getting married is very much like going to a restaurant with friends. You order what you want then, when you see what the other person has, you wish you had ordered that.

Man: Is there any way for long life?
Dr: Get married.
Man: Will it help?
Dr: No, but the thought of long life will never come.

Why do couples hold hands during their wedding?
It's a formality just like two boxers shaking hands before the fight begins!

Wife: Darling today is our anniversary, what shou ld we do?
Husband: Let us stand in silence for 2 minutes.

It's funny when people discuss Love Marriage vs Arranged.
It's like asking someone, if suicide is better or being murdered.

It is difficult to understand GOD. He makes such beautiful things as women and then he turns them into Wives.

If u r married please ignore this msg,
for everyone else: Happy Independence Day

Before marriage, a man will lie awake all night thinking about something you say.
After marriage, he'll fall asleep before you finish.

There's a way of transferring funds that is even faster than electronic banking. It's called marriage.

Girlfriends r like chocolates,
taste good anytime.
Lovers r like PIZZAS,
Hot n spicy, eaten frequently.
Wives r like Dal RICE , eaten when there's no choice.

Man receives telegram: Wife dead-should be buried or cremated?
Man: Don't take any chances. Burn the body and bury the ash.

Prospective husband: Do you have a book called 'Man, The Master of Women'?
Salesgirl: The fiction department is on the other side, sir.

There was this guy who told his woman that he loved her so much that he would go through hell for her. They got married and now he is going thru hell.

Fact of life: One woman brings you into this world crying & the other ensures you continue to do so for the rest of your life!

Q: Why doesn't law permit a man to marry a second woman?
A: Because as per law you cannot be punished twice for the same offence!

Share |