Monday, September 26, 2011

Good news for Car Owners : INDIA 2015


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Good news for Car Owners : INDIA 2015
Good News For Car Owners - INDIA -2015 - Car Loans Available Here ...

Good news for Car Owners : INDIA 2015

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Thursday, September 22, 2011

Prove that (2 / 10) = 2


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The Question : Prove that ( 2 / 10 ) = 2 ?

1) The Arts Student : This is our of syllabus !

2) The commerce Student: This is Wrong

3) The Medical Student : How is it possible ?

4) The MBA Student: It is none of my business

5) The Engineering Student: "It is so easy !" See the details bellow:

(2 / 10 )
= (Two / Ten)
= wo / en (because T is common)

Now, 'W' is 23rd letter and 'O' is 15th letter
Similarly,
'E' is 5th and 'N' is 14th

Hence ( wo / en ) = ( 23 + 15 ) / ( 5 + 14 )
= ( 38 / 19 )
= 2

Engineers are never worried about what is the answer! (i.e. What needs to be done?)

They will only ask which answer you want? (i.e. What do you want as a result? and give you the results....)

Engineers Rocks!

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Tuesday, September 20, 2011

Latest Cool Jokes Collections of the Day - Part 12


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Teacher: Whoever Answers My Next Question, Can Go Home.

A Boy Throws His Bag Out Through The Window.
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... Teacher: Who Threw The Bag ?
Boy: Me..I'm Going Home. .....c.P

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Wife: Listen, your best friend is getting married to a really horrible girl, why dont you stop him?
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Husband: Why should I stop him? He never stopped me! :P :D


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This couple had 4 sons. The first 3 were fair, redheads with blue eyes and the last one was dark, with curly hair, and short. When the man was on his deathbed, he whispered to his wife- baby, are you sure that you never cheated on me? Our last son is giving me doubts. . .
Wife swears that he is his son. Husband dies. . .
Soon after that. . .
Wife- thank goodness he din ask abt the first three sons. . .

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Q: Can a woman turn u into a Millionaire?

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A: Yes.....If you are a Billionaire.

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How do College Teacher Complete Syllabus-
Unit 1- This is just introducti on no need to teach
Unit 2- Very easy topic you can study on your own
Unit 3- this has is already been discussed in last
Unit 4- Dis topic is directly givenin text book study as it is I dont need to teach it.
Unit 5- Who is ready to take seminar ???

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Latest Cool Jokes Collections of the Day - Part 11


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Newly married husbnd SaVED wife's nUmbEr on mobile as
"MY LIFE"

Aftr 1yr:"MY WIFE"

5 yEArs:"HOME"

10 YEArs:"HITLER"

25 YEArs: "WRONG NUMBER"! :P
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An unmarried man wrote his status on Facebook as:

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" Wanted wife "

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2 girls liked it

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And 150 men commented-"Bhai Meri Leja ".............:-)

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I luv walking in rain so that no one can see my tears : the old one

I luv walking in the fog so that no one can see that m smoking : the new one

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Latest : I luv walking, bcoz petrol / diesel mehnga ho gaya hae..............:-)


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Naukar-Sahab apka kutta to admi jaisa dikhta hae,

Kya khilate ho ???????

Sahab-Kamine ye kutta nahi,

Mera beta hae,

Engineering ker raha hae aur abhi iske exams chal rahe hae...........:-)

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The CEO returned from lunch in a good mood and called the whole staff in to listen to a couple of jokes he had picked up on Friday.


Everybody, but one girl laughed uproariously. What's the matter? grumbled the boss.Haven't you got a sense of humour? I don't have to laugh, she replied. I'm leaving on Friday.

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If a single teacher can't teach us all the subjects , Then How could he expects a single student to learn all subjects ?

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Old Generation: Neki kar, Dariya mein daal

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New Generation: Kuch bhi kar, Facebook pe daal
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Don't break anybody's heart they have only one.

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If u r angry break their bones they have 206 on them... :)

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Monday, September 19, 2011

Latest Cool Jokes Collections of the Day - Part 10


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Boyfriend: Do you think my salary is sufficient for you?
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Girlfriend: It is sufficient for me, but how will you survive?

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Museum Administrator: That’s a 500 year old statue you have broken.-
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Santa: Thanks God! I thought it was a new one.

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मर्द

मर्द अगर औरत पर हाथ उठाए तो ज़ालिम ,
औरत से पिट जाये तो बुजदिल
औरत को किसी के साथ देख कर लड़े तो इर्शालू,
अगर कुछ न कहे तो बेघैरत
अगर घर से बहार रहे तो आवारा ,
घर में रहे तो नाकारा
बचों को डांटे तो ज़ालिम ,
न डांटे तो लापरवाह
हाय मर्द बेचारा जिसके जीवन मे सिर्फ दर्द ही दर्द है
और उपरसे कहते है की मर्द वही होता है जिसको दर्द नही होता

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Laloo was filling up application form for a job.

He was not sure what to be filled in column “Salary Expected”.
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After much thought he wrote: YES Expected!

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Buyer to seller: Is it a faithful dog?


Marathi Seller: Yes, I have sold it 3 times earlier also. It is so faithful, everytime it returned back to me.

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a girl and a boy were eating food

girl - i want to tell u something

boy - we should not talk while eating

(after the lunch was over)


boy - tell what u were saying ???

girl - there was a cockroach in your foods .....

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DAUGHTER: mum, that man gave me $10 to climb that tree.


MOTHER: stupid! he wanted to see your panty!
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DAUGHTER: ahah! I'm clever, I did not wear any of them!


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A fairy saw a bear chasing a rabbit. she asked both to stop "i will grant u both 3 wishes"

bear-" i wish all the bears in this forest except me , be female."

The rabbit wishes for a helmet

bear thought - stupid rabbit,wasting his wish

bear-"i wish all the bears in the next forest , be female."

the rabbit asks for a motorcycle

Bear was shocked again

bear-"make all the bears in the world female except me."

the rabbit grinned, started his bike n said

" make this bear GAY"

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Sunday, September 11, 2011

Latest Cool Jokes Collections of the Day - Part 9


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A Man on Death Bed confesses to his Wife
"I had an Affair with ur Sister , your Friend & the Maid... Please FORGIVE Me:(
WIFE: I know Honey. Now Relax & "Let the POISON WORK" :O :D

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Loffer' Aur 'Offer

Teacher- 'Loffer' Aur 'Offer' Me Kya diffrence Hai.?

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Student- Simple Mam..

Ladka 'I Love U' Bole To Loffer

Aur

Ladki 'I Love U' Bole To Offer

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Thought of the Day:
A Woman Is Completely Harmless and Doesn't Believe In Violence..

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Until Her Nail Polish Gets Dry... =D

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( Teacher to santa)
what's cylone ?
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Santa :
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a short loan given by bank for purchasing cycle is called as cyclone :D =)

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Saturday, September 10, 2011

Latest Cool Jokes Collections of the Day - Part 8


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Touch it gently, put two fingers inside. If it's wide, use three fingers. Make sure it's wet and rub up and down.
Yep, that's how you wash a cup.

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What Is Love?
For A Boy: It Is That Stupid Nervousness Before Proposing A Girl. .
For A Girl :It Is That Excitement Of Standing Before A Nervous Boy

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When You Mess Up A Guy's Hair ..
He Thinks Its Cute ..
But When You Mess Up A Girl's Hair ..
May Your Soul Rest In Peace!! xD xP

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Love is possible after friendship, but friendship
is not possible after love because medicines work
before death not after death.

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When Words Are Not Enough To Express Your Feelings ..

Dont Think That You Are In Love ..

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It Means That You Need To Improve Your Vocabulary!

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Friday, September 9, 2011

We would be 5 always


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Child to His grand mother: We should remain 5 always, right? You, Mom, Dad, Sister and Me

Grand Mother: No, When you will get married we will be 6.

Child: Then my sister will also get married and we would be 5 again.

Again Grand Mother: No son, then you will get child and we will be 6

Child: But, then when will you die we would be again 5.

Grand Mother: beats the child and scolds a lot ......

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Thursday, September 8, 2011

Latest Cool Jokes Collections of the Day - Part 1


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Husband: i m hpy that this year u wil nt go 2 market 4 eid shopping.
Wife: dnt b crazy darling, i wil cmplt my eid shpng at home with internet. Give me ur credit card. . .

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a miser rich man bought a 2nd class ticket of train.

Poor man: u hav enough money but why hav u bought 2nd cls ticket?

Rich man: coz 3rd cls tickts hav been finished. . . .


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Robert: How do you shake your coffee ?
Randy: with my right hand.
Robert: but i use spoon:p:p:p:


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in a programme,

1st man: the programmer woman is so ugly. .

2nd man: she is my wife.

1st man: oh, i am sorry:(

2nd man: not more than me:(:(


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The judge said to the accused:"I thought I told you I never wanted to see you in here again." "Your honour," the criminal said, "thats what I tried to tell the police,but they wouldn't listen."

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Teeth: Oh tongue, if i just press u little, u'll get cut.
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Tongue: if I misuse one
word against some1, den all 32
of u'll come Out..;-):-):-)

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A guy ordered a soup..then he saw a fly in his soup..

Man : waiter! Waiter! There is a fly in ma soup..

Waiter : poor guy,havent seen a fly before?

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Journalist: so when u came to this town u have nothing but a small bag. Right?

Millionaire: ya, u r right. Now i am a millionaire because of that bag.

Journalist: how was it possible? What was in that bag??

Millionaire: One Million dollar:):):)

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Boyfriend: What is your favorite music group?

Girlfriend: I love U2!

Boyfriend: I love you too, but what is your favorite music group?

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My wife asked,"what are u planning on getting me for my birthday.

"I was thinking of the new expensive l'oreal roll on deodorant" i said

she said,"oh right l'oreal because im worth it?"

i said "no because u stink"

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Husband: i cant go outside to buy these things coz the crash between gov & opposition parties is going on.
Wife: dont worry dear, wear the helmet of your bike to be safe. . . .

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one day a man found problem in his tv. The picture was clear but the volume was silent.

Man: please go to our nearest neighbor & tell them to increase the volume of their tv.

Wife: why?

Man: we will watch our tv & hear the sound of their tv ;);)

Wife: :p:p:p

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Husband entered into the house with a golden cup & he was very tired.

Wife: why are you so tired & how have you gotten this golden cup?

Husband: i have won it from a race competition by beating 2 runners.

Wife: were there only 3 participants?

Husband: yes you are right. i was the first, the police was 2nd & the owner of the cup was 3rd in the race:p:p:p

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Police: why are you in the street in this deep night ? Can you explain it clearly?

Victim: if i could explain the reason to my wife i would have been inside my home.

Police: oh. . . . . .

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Wednesday, September 7, 2011

Financial Management Without MBA


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A beggar found 100 rs.
He went to 5 star hotel for dinner bill - 3000 rs.
Manager handed him to police.
He gave 100 rs. to police and free.
Its called FINANCIAL MANAGEMENT without MBA.

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