Latest Cool Jokes Collections of the Day - Part 15

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Guy: If you are smiling, send me your smiles.

If you are sleeping, send me your dreams.

If you are crying, send me your tears.

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Girl: I am in Toilet…. What should I send?


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Girl: I can do anything 4 u?

Boy: Will you die for me?

Girl: Yes.

Boy: Will you delete ur Facebook account 4 me?

Girl: Go home Bro, ur mother might be getting worried.



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A kid gets zero in a paper Father angrily asks:Whats this?

Kid:Teacher didn't have more stars to give so she started giving MOONS



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Height of technical overdose.

A computer software engineer was falling from roof of a building,
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and shouting F1, F1, F1, Instead of help, help, help!



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Love is Life ,

Life is like a Wife ,

Wife is like a Knife , and

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Knife is the End of Life

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Latest Cool Jokes Collections of the Day - Part 14

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Difference between Friend & Wife

U can Tell ur Friend


"U r my Best Friend"

But

Do u have courage tell to ur Wife


"U r my Best Wife?"

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6 PAKISTANIS & 1 INDIAN were hanging below Helicopter on rope.

Pilot- One must leave B'coz of Overload.

INDIAN said - "I will Sacrifice."

All PAKISTANIS

"CLAPPED ;-)

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Misuse of English!

A Diagram in A Book Was Not Clear

So da Teacher Drew The Diagram

On Da Blackboard & said:


"Dont Look At The Book Figure,Look At My Figure":D

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Fact about women:

They can see a hair of a girl on their husband's coat from 20 meters,


but can't see a pillar from 2 meters while parking a car . . . :


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2 friends,
"see" & "saw":
1 day "see" saw sea & "saw"
didnt see sea.
"See" saw sea and jumped in sea.
"Saw" didnt see sea but jumped
in sea.
"See" saw "saw" in sea & "saw"
saw "see" in sea.
"See" "saw" both saw sea & both
"saw" & "see" were happy to see
Sea.
That is how to exercise your
brain..!


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Sometimes wen i cry no 1 c my
tears,
wen i m woried no 1 c my pain,
wen i m happy no 1 c my smile
lekin...
sala. 1 ladki k saath ghoomay
to sab dekh lete hai..
( wen wndring with girl, all c me )...


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Girl: If we got married, stop smoking.
Boy: Ok!
Girl: Drinking too.
Boy: Ok!
Girl: N going to the night club too.
Boy:- Yes..
Girl:- What else can u leave??
Boy:- The idea of marrying You :D

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Once a Boy
was Smoking at Airport
Girl asked: 1 din me kitny Cigarette
peete ho?
Boy: Why?
Girl: Agar ab tek Zindagi me Cigarrete
pe kharch kiye huye Paissy bechate to
Samne khari hui Car tumhari hoti
Boy: Aap Cigarrete peeti han?
Girl: No
Boy: to kya wo Car apki hai?
Girl: No
Boy: Thanks for Advice wo Car meri hi
hai
Moral: Zyada Lecture dene se b bizzati
ho jati hai.

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There is a Bug

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Latest Cool Jokes Collections of the Day - Part 13

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Woman's Tongue and Man's Eye ..

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Rest only When they DIE

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Santa aur uski wife Preeto mein jhagra hua to Preeto ne apni maa ko phone kiya,

"Maa mera un se jhagra ho gaya hai ..

Main 1 Month k liye app k ghar aa rahi hun."

Maa boli-Jhagra kis ne start kiya ??????

Wife-Unho ne.

Maa-"Jhagra us kambakhat ne kiya hai saza bhi ushe hi milni chahiye.
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Tum wahien thehro MAE aa rahi hun 3 Month k liye"...............:-)

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6 PAKISTANIS & 1 INDIAN were hanging below Helicopter on rope.

Pilot- One must leave B'coz of Overload.

INDIAN said - "I will Sacrifice."

All PAKISTANIS

"CLAPPED ;-)

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A 9 year old boy went 2 an ICE CREAM parlour.
Waiter:Wat do u want?
Boy:How much a CONE ICE CREAM costs?
Waiter:Rs.15
Then d BOY checked his pocket & asked cost of small cone?
... Waiter irritated n said Rs.12.
Boy ordered a small cone,had it,paid bill & left.
When da waiter came to pick da EMPTY PLATE tears rolled down 4m
his eyes.
u know y....?
The boy had left Rs.3 as TIP for him...
MAKE EVERY ONE HAPPY WITH SOMETHING U HAVE... :)

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As a kid i was an OUTSTANDING student...

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Most of the time i used to STAND outside the class =P

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4 Gals take lift in a car full f Engineers.
Since no place , they sat on Boys Lap

After TEN Mins

Girl 1 : Are you a ECE Engineer ? Boy1 : How u Know ?
Girl 1 : Your tower is communicating with my
unreachable Area ! xP

Girl 2 : are you a Computer Engineer ?
Boy 2 : How you know ?
Girl 2 : Your Pendrive is trying to connect with my USB Drive ! =@

Girl 3 : Are you a Mechanical Engineer ?
Boy 3 : How you Know ?
Girl 3 : Your Piston is trying to move into My Cylinder !

Girl 4 : Are you a Civil Enginner ?
Boy 4 : How do you Know ?

Girl 4 : Your Dam has Broken and Flodded my Village

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How Bussiness Works?

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Dad : Son, I want you to marry the girl of my choice.

Son : No!

Dad : The girl is daughter of Bill Gates..

... Son : Then OK.

Dad goes to Bill Gates...

Dad : I want your daughter to marry my son.

Bill Gates : No!

Dad : My son is CEO of World Bank...

Bill Gates : Oh, then it's OK

Dad goes to president of World Bank...

Dad : Appoint my son as CEO ...

President : No!

Dad : He is son-in-law of Bill Gates...

President : Then okey.

This is how business works... :-)

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Good news for Car Owners : INDIA 2015

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Good news for Car Owners : INDIA 2015

Good news for Car Owners : INDIA 2015

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Prove that (2 / 10) = 2

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The Question : Prove that ( 2 / 10 ) = 2 ?

1) The Arts Student : This is our of syllabus !

2) The commerce Student: This is Wrong

3) The Medical Student : How is it possible ?

4) The MBA Student: It is none of my business

5) The Engineering Student: "It is so easy !" See the details bellow:

(2 / 10 )
= (Two / Ten)
= wo / en (because T is common)

Now, 'W' is 23rd letter and 'O' is 15th letter
Similarly,
'E' is 5th and 'N' is 14th

Hence ( wo / en ) = ( 23 + 15 ) / ( 5 + 14 )
= ( 38 / 19 )
= 2

Engineers are never worried about what is the answer! (i.e. What needs to be done?)

They will only ask which answer you want? (i.e. What do you want as a result? and give you the results....)

Engineers Rocks!

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Latest Cool Jokes Collections of the Day - Part 12

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Teacher: Whoever Answers My Next Question, Can Go Home.

A Boy Throws His Bag Out Through The Window.
...

... Teacher: Who Threw The Bag ?
Boy: Me..I'm Going Home. .....c.P

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Wife: Listen, your best friend is getting married to a really horrible girl, why dont you stop him?
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Husband: Why should I stop him? He never stopped me! :P :D


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This couple had 4 sons. The first 3 were fair, redheads with blue eyes and the last one was dark, with curly hair, and short. When the man was on his deathbed, he whispered to his wife- baby, are you sure that you never cheated on me? Our last son is giving me doubts. . .
Wife swears that he is his son. Husband dies. . .
Soon after that. . .
Wife- thank goodness he din ask abt the first three sons. . .

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Q: Can a woman turn u into a Millionaire?

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A: Yes.....If you are a Billionaire.

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How do College Teacher Complete Syllabus-
Unit 1- This is just introducti on no need to teach
Unit 2- Very easy topic you can study on your own
Unit 3- this has is already been discussed in last
Unit 4- Dis topic is directly givenin text book study as it is I dont need to teach it.
Unit 5- Who is ready to take seminar ???

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Latest Cool Jokes Collections of the Day - Part 11

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Newly married husbnd SaVED wife's nUmbEr on mobile as
"MY LIFE"

Aftr 1yr:"MY WIFE"

5 yEArs:"HOME"

10 YEArs:"HITLER"

25 YEArs: "WRONG NUMBER"! :P
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An unmarried man wrote his status on Facebook as:

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" Wanted wife "

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2 girls liked it

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And 150 men commented-"Bhai Meri Leja ".............:-)

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I luv walking in rain so that no one can see my tears : the old one

I luv walking in the fog so that no one can see that m smoking : the new one

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Latest : I luv walking, bcoz petrol / diesel mehnga ho gaya hae..............:-)


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Naukar-Sahab apka kutta to admi jaisa dikhta hae,

Kya khilate ho ???????

Sahab-Kamine ye kutta nahi,

Mera beta hae,

Engineering ker raha hae aur abhi iske exams chal rahe hae...........:-)

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The CEO returned from lunch in a good mood and called the whole staff in to listen to a couple of jokes he had picked up on Friday.


Everybody, but one girl laughed uproariously. What's the matter? grumbled the boss.Haven't you got a sense of humour? I don't have to laugh, she replied. I'm leaving on Friday.

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If a single teacher can't teach us all the subjects , Then How could he expects a single student to learn all subjects ?

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Old Generation: Neki kar, Dariya mein daal

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New Generation: Kuch bhi kar, Facebook pe daal
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Don't break anybody's heart they have only one.

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If u r angry break their bones they have 206 on them... :)

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Latest Cool Jokes Collections of the Day - Part 10

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Boyfriend: Do you think my salary is sufficient for you?
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Girlfriend: It is sufficient for me, but how will you survive?

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Museum Administrator: That’s a 500 year old statue you have broken.-
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Santa: Thanks God! I thought it was a new one.

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मर्द

मर्द अगर औरत पर हाथ उठाए तो ज़ालिम ,
औरत से पिट जाये तो बुजदिल
औरत को किसी के साथ देख कर लड़े तो इर्शालू,
अगर कुछ न कहे तो बेघैरत
अगर घर से बहार रहे तो आवारा ,
घर में रहे तो नाकारा
बचों को डांटे तो ज़ालिम ,
न डांटे तो लापरवाह
हाय मर्द बेचारा जिसके जीवन मे सिर्फ दर्द ही दर्द है
और उपरसे कहते है की मर्द वही होता है जिसको दर्द नही होता

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Laloo was filling up application form for a job.

He was not sure what to be filled in column “Salary Expected”.
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After much thought he wrote: YES Expected!

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Buyer to seller: Is it a faithful dog?


Marathi Seller: Yes, I have sold it 3 times earlier also. It is so faithful, everytime it returned back to me.

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a girl and a boy were eating food

girl - i want to tell u something

boy - we should not talk while eating

(after the lunch was over)


boy - tell what u were saying ???

girl - there was a cockroach in your foods .....

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DAUGHTER: mum, that man gave me $10 to climb that tree.


MOTHER: stupid! he wanted to see your panty!
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DAUGHTER: ahah! I'm clever, I did not wear any of them!


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A fairy saw a bear chasing a rabbit. she asked both to stop "i will grant u both 3 wishes"

bear-" i wish all the bears in this forest except me , be female."

The rabbit wishes for a helmet

bear thought - stupid rabbit,wasting his wish

bear-"i wish all the bears in the next forest , be female."

the rabbit asks for a motorcycle

Bear was shocked again

bear-"make all the bears in the world female except me."

the rabbit grinned, started his bike n said

" make this bear GAY"

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Latest Cool Jokes Collections of the Day - Part 9

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A Man on Death Bed confesses to his Wife
"I had an Affair with ur Sister , your Friend & the Maid... Please FORGIVE Me:(
WIFE: I know Honey. Now Relax & "Let the POISON WORK" :O :D

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Loffer' Aur 'Offer

Teacher- 'Loffer' Aur 'Offer' Me Kya diffrence Hai.?

?

Student- Simple Mam..

Ladka 'I Love U' Bole To Loffer

Aur

Ladki 'I Love U' Bole To Offer

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Thought of the Day:
A Woman Is Completely Harmless and Doesn't Believe In Violence..

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Until Her Nail Polish Gets Dry... =D

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( Teacher to santa)
what's cylone ?
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Santa :
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a short loan given by bank for purchasing cycle is called as cyclone :D =)

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Latest Cool Jokes Collections of the Day - Part 8

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Touch it gently, put two fingers inside. If it's wide, use three fingers. Make sure it's wet and rub up and down.
Yep, that's how you wash a cup.

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What Is Love?
For A Boy: It Is That Stupid Nervousness Before Proposing A Girl. .
For A Girl :It Is That Excitement Of Standing Before A Nervous Boy

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When You Mess Up A Guy's Hair ..
He Thinks Its Cute ..
But When You Mess Up A Girl's Hair ..
May Your Soul Rest In Peace!! xD xP

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Love is possible after friendship, but friendship
is not possible after love because medicines work
before death not after death.

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When Words Are Not Enough To Express Your Feelings ..

Dont Think That You Are In Love ..

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It Means That You Need To Improve Your Vocabulary!

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We would be 5 always

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Child to His grand mother: We should remain 5 always, right? You, Mom, Dad, Sister and Me

Grand Mother: No, When you will get married we will be 6.

Child: Then my sister will also get married and we would be 5 again.

Again Grand Mother: No son, then you will get child and we will be 6

Child: But, then when will you die we would be again 5.

Grand Mother: beats the child and scolds a lot ......

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Latest Cool Jokes Collections of the Day - Part 1

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Husband: i m hpy that this year u wil nt go 2 market 4 eid shopping.
Wife: dnt b crazy darling, i wil cmplt my eid shpng at home with internet. Give me ur credit card. . .

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a miser rich man bought a 2nd class ticket of train.

Poor man: u hav enough money but why hav u bought 2nd cls ticket?

Rich man: coz 3rd cls tickts hav been finished. . . .


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Robert: How do you shake your coffee ?
Randy: with my right hand.
Robert: but i use spoon:p:p:p:


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in a programme,

1st man: the programmer woman is so ugly. .

2nd man: she is my wife.

1st man: oh, i am sorry:(

2nd man: not more than me:(:(


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The judge said to the accused:"I thought I told you I never wanted to see you in here again." "Your honour," the criminal said, "thats what I tried to tell the police,but they wouldn't listen."

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Teeth: Oh tongue, if i just press u little, u'll get cut.
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Tongue: if I misuse one
word against some1, den all 32
of u'll come Out..;-):-):-)

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A guy ordered a soup..then he saw a fly in his soup..

Man : waiter! Waiter! There is a fly in ma soup..

Waiter : poor guy,havent seen a fly before?

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Journalist: so when u came to this town u have nothing but a small bag. Right?

Millionaire: ya, u r right. Now i am a millionaire because of that bag.

Journalist: how was it possible? What was in that bag??

Millionaire: One Million dollar:):):)

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Boyfriend: What is your favorite music group?

Girlfriend: I love U2!

Boyfriend: I love you too, but what is your favorite music group?

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My wife asked,"what are u planning on getting me for my birthday.

"I was thinking of the new expensive l'oreal roll on deodorant" i said

she said,"oh right l'oreal because im worth it?"

i said "no because u stink"

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Husband: i cant go outside to buy these things coz the crash between gov & opposition parties is going on.
Wife: dont worry dear, wear the helmet of your bike to be safe. . . .

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one day a man found problem in his tv. The picture was clear but the volume was silent.

Man: please go to our nearest neighbor & tell them to increase the volume of their tv.

Wife: why?

Man: we will watch our tv & hear the sound of their tv ;);)

Wife: :p:p:p

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Husband entered into the house with a golden cup & he was very tired.

Wife: why are you so tired & how have you gotten this golden cup?

Husband: i have won it from a race competition by beating 2 runners.

Wife: were there only 3 participants?

Husband: yes you are right. i was the first, the police was 2nd & the owner of the cup was 3rd in the race:p:p:p

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Police: why are you in the street in this deep night ? Can you explain it clearly?

Victim: if i could explain the reason to my wife i would have been inside my home.

Police: oh. . . . . .

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Financial Management Without MBA

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A beggar found 100 rs.
He went to 5 star hotel for dinner bill - 3000 rs.
Manager handed him to police.
He gave 100 rs. to police and free.
Its called FINANCIAL MANAGEMENT without MBA.

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Latest Cool Jokes Collections of the Day - Part 7

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WHO SAID ENGLISH IS EASY ? DONT BELIVE ?
THEN ANSWER FOR THIS WITH - YES OR NO .
________ i'm a monkey . !!!

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Two management students were walking across campus when one said, "Where did you get such a great bike?"

The second student replied, "Well, I was walking along yesterday minding my own business when a beautiful woman rode up on this bike. She threw the bike to the ground, took off all her clothes and said, "Take what you want."

The second engineer nodded approvingly, "Good choice; the clothes probably wouldn't have fit."

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INFORMATION OF THE DAY .
DO U KNOW THE WORLD'S FASTEST TRAIN ?
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SORRY THE TRAIN WENT SO FAST LIKE ZOOII.... TAT I CANT READ !!! ;)

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A scooter mechanic to a doctor" i change the oil just like you change the blood ,i change the the parts of engine just like you do surgery , after the accident i work on dent just like you plaster the fractured part of the body then why are you paid a lot more than me and the doctor replied" have you tried something like this when engine is on"

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doctor 1 - che with very hard work i did operation and i tried my best . but i dint save the patient .
doctor 2 - u stupid . u dint do operation u did postmortem !!


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difference between a friend and lover
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when u got accident and u r in hospital
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lover - how r u ?
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but a friend .
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dude how does tat nurse look ?

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In a gents toilet it was written "shake well after use"

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One guy said to another "i love her but she has a boy friend"and the other replied " every goal post has goal keeper it does not mean that you can not score"

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Teacher : Make a Sentence abt HAND !

Student : My Penis in your hand :P

(Teacher Slaps)

Student : I forgot a Space Between Pen + is (My Pen is in your hand)! :D


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Wife: Why are you home so early?
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Husband: My boss told me to go to hell..

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4 Sardars | Sardar Joke

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4 sardar started petrol pump




No customer came to their petrol pump
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Why?
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Because Petrol pump was on the 2nd floor,
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Then all 4 of them started Restaurant on the same floor


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Still no customer come over there ,





Why?






Because they did not remove petrol pump board from there







then they bought 1 taxi,





still they did not get any customer to ride in taxi,





Why?







Because 2 sardar was seating on front seat and 2 sardar was seating on the back seat and searching for customer.







Now suddenly taxi got stuck on the road and not starting at all,





Then all four of them came out and pushing the taxi, still taxi was not moving at all





Why?





because 2 of then pushing form back and other 2 were pushing form front.




Sardar Rocks :-)

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Teacher Student Jokes

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Maths Teacher to Brilliant Student :

How can you distribute 8 Apples among 6 people equally?

Student : Make a Juice and give it to all of them !! ;

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Top Answers Of Teachers

If They Don't Know The Answers:

1)I Think The Question Is Wrong..

2)I Will Tell You Tomorrow..

3)Don't Ask Foolish Questions..

4)You Will Study This In The Next Class..

And The Most Important One Is:

5)Nice Question,Raise Your Hands Who Know The Answer :)


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Teacher:What is a half of 8?

Student:Do you want the answer vertically or horizontally?

Teacher:What do you mean?

Student:Well,vertically it is 3 and horizontally it is 0.



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Latest Cool Jokes Collections of the Day - Part 6

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Digital Boy: Will You Marry Me?

Girl: Yes!
...

(Digital Boy Starts Running…)

Girl: Hey Where Are You Going?

Digital Boy: I’m Going To Update

My Relationship Status On
Facebook.

Girl: You are really digital !!!!



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Teacher: What is common between BUDHA, JESUS, KRISHNA, RAM & GANDHI?

Student: All are born on
government holidays...!!!


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Harper: what is the easy way to go to the nearest hospital ?

stranger: stand at the middle of the highway for sometime. You will be taken to the nearest hospital soon automatically.


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A door knocks,

Nobody replied. The door knocks again.

Insider asked: Who is there?

Ans: Its Me,"TRUE LOVE"

Insider: U r wrong "TRUE LOVE NEVER KNOCKS TWICE"


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Boy: i'll climb d tallest mountain, swim d deepst ocean, pass the rough way, walk on burning coal for u.
Girl: how sweet of u..Can u come 2 meet me now?
Boy: R u mad? its raining. . . . .
Girl: ??!!!


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Sir: What is difference between ORANGE & APPLE?
Digital Student: Color of ORANGE is
orange, but color of APPLE is not
apple
Sir: !!!!

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There is only 1 perfect mother in the world & every child thinks HE has it.
..
.. .. There is only 1 perfect child in the world & every mother thinks d NEIGHBOUR has it! :D:D :P:P

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daughter: Mum!!!!! Baby's sweater has been fallen down from our 8th floor. . . Mum: What?? Quickly bring baby to me. Otherwise baby may b caught by fever.
Daughter: baby was in the sweater :(:(
Mum: Noooo!!!!


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Harper: why have u kept ur umbrella reversely?
Orton: There is no water at my home. So i am collecting water!!!!!

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Imran: xam is knocking at the door. How is ur study?
Shahid: i m very tensd abt the xam. So i cant study well. When the xam wil b finishd i wil b tensn free. Then i wil study well with a free & fresh mind:):):):)


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a man sat on the middle of a road & was seeing the sky. A stranger told him to leave the place as any kind of accident might be occured by a car. The man replied that a few minutes ago a plane flew away but nothing happened. So what about a car!!!!!!

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Wife: Why r u watching our marriage certificate so carefully?
Husband: Not for a big reason. 1ly try to find the expired date.
Wife: ????!!!!!

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three facts about life:
1. U cant touch all ur teeth with ur tongue.
2. U r retarded cause u just tried it.
3. Now u r smiling coz u r an idiot . . . ;)

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Boss hangs a notice in office, "I'm the
boss,dont forget". When he
returns from lunch.. someone
wrote under it, "Ur wife called
up, she wants her notice back at
home":p:p:p

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Once James bond shoot a person & say I’m bond, James bond. But the person catches the bullet and throw at bond & bond dies. The person says “i m don, superdon”

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Professor: Chemical symbol of
Barium?
Student: BA
Professor: Good. For sodium?
Student: NA
Professor: Vry Good. What will we get if 1 atom of BA
& 2 atoms of NA combined?
Student: BANANA
Professor: ????!!!!

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Special coaching center: To get chance in a renowned university you must admit into our special coaching center as soon as possible. Because our number of seats is limited.
Student: will i have to admit into another coaching to get chance into your special coaching center?
Special coaching center: ????

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A five year
Old girl went to a pharmacy &
asked the pharmacist ...
This is the only money i have,
can i buy Miracles???
The pharmacist confused with
what the girl asked and said ... Why do you need miracles for???
The girl replied ...
Because the dOctOr said that only
miracles can save my mOm ..... :'( :'(

===========================================================

Teacher: listen students, within 30 minute headmaster will come to visit this exam hall. So be careful.
A student: why is it necessary to be careful? We are not following unfair way!!!
Teacher: i want to tell you that if you want to follow unfair way complete it as soon as possible before reaching headmaster. Understand?
Student: ???!!!

===========================================================

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Latest Cool Jokes Collections of the Day - Part 5

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GirL: How many hours a day do you think of me?
BOy: 16 hours .
Girl: What? what about the
remaining 8 hours?
BoY: The other 8 is when I'm
dreaming of you in my sleep. . . . .


=============================================================

It dog is dog a dog way dog 2 dog make dog an dog idiot dog busy dog 4 dog 20 seconds!! Now read it without dog. . . . . .

=============================================================

Teacher: suppose you have got 1 lac dollar in a lottery. Now write an essay on this topic.
Digital Student: take my paper.
Teacher: what happened? Why is your paper empty??
Digital Student: what do you think about me, Sir? if i get 1 lac dollar in a lottery will i write an essay here??? I will leave school & will lead a gorgeous life. . . . . . .
Teacher: ???!!!

=============================================================

Teacher says to a digital student, In Algebra,
A=B
&
B=C.
It means A=C.
...Now give relevant example.
Digital Student: Sir, I love you & You love your daughter, It means that I love your daughter:p:p:p

=============================================================

First year of marriage: the man speaks, the woman listens.
Second year: the woman speaks, the man listens.
Third year: they both speak and the neighbors listen :p:p:p

=============================================================

in 21st Century
Our Phone : wireless !
Cooking : fireless !
Food : fatless !
Youth : jobless !
Leaders : shameless !
Relations : meaningless !
Attitude : careless !
Feelings : heartless !
Education : valueless !
But still,
Our Hopes : Endless..!!!:P

=============================================================

A digital boy asks a girl in a market.... I have lost my girlfrnd. Can u talk 2 me for a minute? ...
Girl: why?
Digital Boy: bcoz wenever i talk to a girl my girlfrnd finds me....
Girl: :D:D:D:D:D

=============================================================

A police caught a thief & was taking him to the jail. In the way. . . . .

Thief: please wait here for a few minute. i have to buy cigarette.

Police: i know then you will run away.

Thief: believe me i wont.

Police: I have a idea.

Thief: what?

Police: you stand here for a few minute & i am going to buy your cigarette. . . . .


=============================================================

Boy reached home very late at night.

Father (angrily): where were you???

Boy: i was at friends home!

Father called his 10 friends,

4 answered: "yes Uncle! he was here with me."

3 answered: "he just left a little while ago."

2 answered: "he is still here and we are studying."

and the last one crossed all limits he answered, "hello Papa! i will come late tonight."

Father: !!!!

=============================================================

Digital Student: Would you punish me for some thing i didn't do?

Teacher: no, of course not.

Digital Student: good, because i didn't do my homework

Teacher: ???

=============================================================

Teacher: if a person is about to be drowned in water try to help him by pulling his hair.

Digital Student: then we cant help you in this way.

Teacher: Why?

Digital Student: As you have no hair on your head.

Teacher: ?????

=============================================================

Laughter is the best medicine, But if u are laughing without any reason, u need medicine..! ;)

=============================================================

Son: it would be best for me if i was born many years ago.

Mum: Why?

Son: Then i did not need to study & memorise history. I would be the boss of history automatically. . . . . . . . .

Mum: !!!!

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Latest Cool Jokes Collections of the Day - Part 4

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Wife: Honey, why are you wearing your wedding ring on the wrong finger?
Husband: Because I married the wrong woman. :/

========================================================================
Which is the oldest animal in the world?
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
its the zebra coz its still black and white..!


========================================================================

Diplomacy of Girls & Gentle
Ladies.. They hate it when u ask their
age...
>
..
>
.. >
..
>
..
>
.. >
..
>
..
>
.. >
..
>
.. But they would kill u, if you
forget their BIRTHDAY.. ;D

========================================================================

Teacher: just imagine you are on the 3rd floor,
it caught fire & how will you escape? Student: its simple.
I will
.
.
.
. .
.
.
.
.
.. stop my imagination!!! Teacher Shocks
Student Rocks....

========================================================================

Teacher :- Can you tell the Name of 2 Kings who have brought Happiness and Peace in to People's
Lives ?
Student :- Smo-KING and
Drin-KING!!! *

========================================================================

Girl: if i was in the hospital for a week how many times would you come to see me?
Digital Boy: Once
Girl: What Once?:@:@
Digital Boy: Because then I would Never Leave you
Girl: :-)-:)-:)

========================================================================

A girl wearing a very short skirt visited her boyfriend.
Boyfriend: will ur mum not say anything about ur dress?
Girl:she will be very angry with me because im wearing her skirt.

========================================================================

A man went to sell his dog. A buyer asked him,“Is this dog faithful?”

The man replied, “Yes,I have sold him 3 times but he returns to me."

========================================================================

Girl: I never win. :'(
Boy: Now thats a lie!
Girl: How??
Boy: b'coz you won my heart
Girl: wow!!! :):)

========================================================================

Digital Boy: I sent love letters to my girlfriend everyday for 3years.
Friend:Then what happened?
Digital Boy: Nothing. finally She married the postman:(:(

========================================================================

A doctor & a lawyer were talking at a party. They were interrupted by people describing their ailments & asking d doctor 4 free medical advice.

After an hour of discussion the doctor asked the lawyer, "What do u do 2 stop people from asking u 4 legal advice when u r out of office?"

"I give it 2 them & then send them a bill."

The doctor was shocked but agreed 2 give it a try.

The next day, the doctor prepared the bills.

When he went 2 place them in his mailbox, he find a bill from the lawyer.

========================================================================

A man at medical store: I need poison.
Retailer: I cant sell u, until u
have prescription.
Man: showed his Wedding card
...
Retailer: Sir, what do u need? Big or small bottle??

========================================================================

Dad: why ur sister is sitting so silent?
Digital Son: nothing dad,she asked for me the lipstic i gave her fevistic
no chip chip
no chik chik
Dad: ??!!

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Latest Cool Jokes Collections of the Day - Part 3

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Doctor: Do exercise daily for gud health Me: Sir i play football, cricket,
tennis daily.
.
.
.
. Doctor: how long do you play?
.
.
.
.
. .
.
.
. .
.
Me : until d battery in my mobile
goes down !!
]


====================================================================

Jack: i dnt walk now a days.
Kalis: that means u go to toilet by car. . . .
Jack: ???


====================================================================

Teacher: does ever our dreams come true? Digital student: of course sir, its true when we are in deep sleep. . . .
Teacher:???


====================================================================

A teacher and his wife were sitting at the dinner table when the wife asked, "Anything new at work?"

"No," he replied. "I teach history, remember?"


====================================================================

A boy wanted to know
the age of his girlfriend,,,,
So he asked..... Darling What is your Birth date?????
Girl: 15th August
Boy: Which year?????
Girl: Sweet heart Every Year.... :p :)


====================================================================

One day, Love and Friendship met ..
Love asked,"Why do you exist
when I already exist"??
Friendship smiled and said, "To put a smile where you leave tears".


====================================================================

Facebook keeps suggesting us "The people u may know"
But when we try to add them.. It again says "Do u know them
personally?".. ohh what the hell !


====================================================================

Teacher: "Look the mathematics is simple I have 5 bottles in one hand and 6 bottles in the other. What do I have?"

student: A Drinking problem?


====================================================================

1st man: I am getting married because I am tired of eating outside, cleaning the house & doing laundry.

2nd man: Strange!!, i am divorcing for the same reasons!:P


====================================================================

Wife: I am going 2 LONDON. What gift do u want?

Husband: One British girl.

Wife returns to India.

Husband: Where is my gift?

Wife: Wait for 9 months

haha


====================================================================

I said to my wife, "I'm thinking about paying for a face transplant."

She said, "Don't be silly, there's nothing wrong with your face."

I said, "I was talking about your face."


====================================================================

A farmer decides to play a prank on easter sunday. He goes into the chicken coop and replaces every white egg with a brightly coloured one. . . He stealthily walks out. . . A moment later, the rooster walks in, takes one look at the eggs and goes out and beats up the peacock. . .

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Trick Call Your Children home on Festival

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An elderly man in Phoenix calls his son in New York and says I hate to ruin ur day, but I have to tell u that ur mother and I are divorcing, 54 years of misery is enough.”

Pop what are you talking about? the son screams

We can’t stand the sight of each other any longer the old man says

We’re sick of each other, I’m sick of talking about this, so u call ur sister in Chicago and tell her and he hangs up.
‎, the son calls his sister, who explodes on the phone. “Like heck they’re getting divorced,” she shouts, “I’ll take care of this.” She calls Phoenix immediately, and screams at the old man, “You are NOT getting divorced. Don’t do a single thing until I get there. I’m calling my brother back, and we’ll both be there tomorrow. Until then, don’t do a thing, DO YOU HEAR ME?” and hangs up.

The old man hangs up his phone and turns to his wife. “Okay,” he says, “They’re coming for Thanksgiving and paying their own fares Now what do we tell them for Christmas?

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Latest Cool Jokes Collections of the Day - Part 2

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It's my wife's birthday today so I went out earlier in the week and deliberately got her a present that I knew she'd hate.

True to form she opened it, took one look and said, "What the fuck would I want with an xbox?

I'm going to take this back to the shop and ask for a refund.

"I can't wait to see her little face when she gets arrested for looting.

=================================================================

Girl: Mom,can i go 4 a walk 4 some fresh air..???

Mom: yes sure. But ask ur "fresh air" 2 drop u home before 9:00 pm ....

Girl: Oh, mom. . . . .

=================================================================

one day a stranger was walking along the street.

Suddenly he saw something on the street and stopped.

Then he took a part of that & tasted & it was a man's dust.

Then he said to himself ' i m lucky that i do not put my leg on it.'

(hahaha. . .but he tasted it)

=================================================================

Teacher: how many bones does a man have??

Digital student opens his dress & starts to count his bones :p:p:p:p

Teacher: ?!!!

=================================================================

Girl : Am I pretty?

Boy : NO.

Girl : Do you want to be with me forever?

Boy : NO.

...Girl : Would you cry if I walked away?...........................

Boy : NO.

She heard enough, and was hurt. She walked away, tears ran down her face.

The boy grabbed her arm.

Boy : Your not pretty, your beautiful.
I don't want to be with you forever, I NEED to be with you forever.
And I wouldn't cry if you walked away, I would DIE.

(Boy whispers) : Please? Stay with me.

(Girl whispers) : I will:):)


=================================================================

News: Children are so happy when they heard about any kind of invitation. But in some invitation they are not allowed:(:(
Guest: what is the problem if the children come?
Host: sorry, non voter are not allowed. . . . .

=================================================================

Q. Happiness is necessary. Because everybody wants to get happiness. Why not sadness??
A. Sadness is also necessary. Because everybody wants to give sadness:p:p:p


=================================================================

Teacher: What is the easy way to be millionaire??
Digital Student: To marry a millionaire. . . . . . .


=================================================================

Teacher: how many types of gender do you know?
Student: 4 types.
Teacher: tell me
Student: masculine gender, feminine gender, alekgender, newton gender.
Teacher: ??!!

=================================================================

Meghna: u r becomin donkey day by day.
Jamuna: i know this. Because in the past i failed to understand your language but now a days i can understand lightly:p:p:p

=================================================================

8 years old kid was
taking bath in bathtub with his 6
year old girlfriend. Suddenly
Girlfriend ask the kid slowly: Hey
can i touch your rod? Kid replied
"No Way You broke Yours, Now
You Wanna Break Mine"
hahahahaha!!! [L.I.K.E]

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Lots of Fun - Must Read Jokes

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GIRL:- U found a new girl?

BOY:- Yes And i m very happy with her,

GIRL:- oh really? Can she make u smile as i did?

BOY:-NO but she doesn't make me CRY as u did. :'(


============================================

SOMEBODY Whom You L () \/ E ♥ Enters Your Life Just For Two Reasons

...- Either For Loving You ...Forever . . . *.*

0r

... - To Teach You Not To Love Again Ever . . . =[


============================================

My Lesbian neighbors asked me what I wanted for my Birthday. They gave me a Rolex. I think they misunderstood when I said "I wanna watch.''

============================================

Most twisted lines on a girl's T-Shirt

FRONT SIDE:

"Shame on U boyz I m still virgin!"


BACK SIDE:

"Stop checking me out, this is an old T-shirt..

============================================

Most irritating moment: Morning alarms :@

Most difficult task: to find socks :P

Most dreadful journey: way to class :(
...
Most lovely time: meeting friends :D

Most tragic news: test in 1st period :'(

Most wonderful newz: teacher is absent ;)

Most relaxing area: Last Bench :D:P

Most funny moment: teacher crack a joke and nobody laughs :D

=======================================

A man sent SMS to his BOSS: “Me sick, can’t do work”

Boss SMS back: “When I am sick I kiss my wife try it”

2 hours later man sms 2 boss: “Me ok, ur wife very sweet”

==========================================================

2 women talking!
.
.
1st women : why didn't you divorce your husband if you hate him so much?


2nd women : oh! i hate him so much so i cant bear 2 see him happy after divorce......


==========================================================

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Make 125 CRORE Indians Forever Happy..!

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Once Kapil sibble, Digvijay singh & Chidambaram were travelling in a helicopter,

Sibble drops a 100 rs. note & says," I made one poor Indian Happy!"

Singh drops two 50 rs. note & says." I made two poor Indians Happy!"

Chiddu drops 100 one rupee coin & says," I made 100 poor Indians Happy!"

Hearing dis, da PILOT laugh & say- ,I will drop down all 3 of you and make 125 CRORE Indians Forever Happy..!

Pilot was ANNA HAZARE :) :)

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Few SMS Jokes for Fun

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Teacher : U failure !
At ur age Bill gates stood first in the class
Student : Mind u, Sir,
but at ur age hitler commited suicide


==============================================================================


First Guy (proudly): "My wife's an angel!"

Second Guy: "You're lucky, mine's still alive."


==========================================================================

MAN: Boy, wats ur
dad's name?
BOY: His name is LAUGHING.
MAN: And ur mother's name?
BOY: SMILING.
MAN: You must b kidding?
BOY: No, that's my brother , I'm
JOKING!!!!

=========================================================================

Girl: I'm
having a heart surgery..
Boy: i know..
Girl: I love you,.
After the surgery, the girl
woke up
with only his father is on
her
side...
Girl: where is he?
Father: you don't know
who gave
you the heart?
Girl: what?? (the girl starts
crying)
.
.
.
.
Father: i'm just kiddin', he
went to
toilet.

===========================================================================

Teacher: Tom, join these 2 sentences.
"I was cycling to school. I saw a dead body."


Tom: I saw a dead body cycling to school.


===============================================================================

Angel: what do u want?

Boy: A beautiful girl.

Angel: If u r muslim i ll give u KATRINA,
If u r hindu i ll give u Kareena,
If u r christian i ll give u Genelia.

Whats ur name...??

Boy: SHEIKH VINOD FERNANDES.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Angel: Give him RAKHI SAWANT for trying to be over smart....! :))

==============================================================================

Teacher: why dint u attend school yesterday?

Student:I was attending my uncle's wedding.

Teacher: and who did he marry?

Student: a wife.

Teacher: stupid. Hv you ever had of any1 marrying a man?

Student: Yes of course. My aunt.
============================================================================

Santa had learn only one essay for
exam on ''friend'' but in exam
the essay which came was ''
father''
Santa replace ''friend'' with
''father'' and it read:
.
.
'I'm am very fatherly person'
.
.
I have lots of fathers.
.
.
.
Some of my fathers are MALE and
some are FEMALES
.
.
.
My true father is my Neighbor..
. :)) ...


==============================================================================

Two Friends talking:

1st frnd: i found dat each & every person starts singng when they enter bathrööm! But why...?

2nd frnd: coz our bathroom door lock doesnt work !!! ;)

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A Boy Thought Of Suicide

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A Boy Thought Of Suicide

He Drank Poison ,But His Father Saved Him

He Hanged, But His Mother Saved Him
.........
He Met With An Accident , Doctor Saved Him

He Jumped Into A Well, Gardener Saved Him
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
At Last He Got Married,

N Now No One Could Save Him :D :P ;)

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Indian Cricketers mindset

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Cricketers mindset:

Ganguly: do or die.
.
.
.

Sehwag: do before you die.
.
.
.

Dravid: do until they die.
.

.
.
Tendulkar: do that will never die.
.
.
.

Laxman- Do when everyone else die.
.
.
.


Yuvraj - Do, die, reborn, do, die, reborn (repeat)....
.
.
.

Finally ...
.
.
.
.
.
.
Dhoni - Do everything before luck die

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Latest Cool Jokes of the Day

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Tom was so excited about his promotion to Vice President of the company he worked for and kept bragging about it to his wife for weeks on end.

Finally she couldn't take it any longer, and told him, "Listen, it means nothing, they even have a vice president of peas at the grocery store!".

"Really?" he said. Not sure if this was true or not, Tom decided to call the grocery store.

A clerk answers and Tom says "Can I please talk to the Vice President of peas?"

The clerk replies "Canned or frozen?"

=========================================================================

An American manufacturer is showing his machine factory to a potential customer from Albania. At noon, when the lunch whistle blows, two thousand men and women immediately stop work and leave the building.

"Your workers, they're escaping!" cries the visitor. "You've got to stop them."

"Don't worry, they'll be back," says the American. And indeed, at exactly one o'clock the whistle blows again, and all the workers return from their break.

When the tour is over, the manufacturer turns to his guest and says, "Well, now, "

"Forget the machines," says the visitor. "How much do you want for that whistle?"


=========================================================================

After a Tom and Jerry like quarrel between the brother and the sister, Dad took the daughter out for shopping.
Dad to her daughter "how much you like your younger brother?"
Daughter " I hate him. he is mean"
To pacify daughter dad said to the little girl "I will buy you the Doll. Now how much you like your brother?
Daughter " Dad....I like him a lot in the PHOTOGRAPH"

=========================================================================

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Every Girl Wants a Guy...

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Every Girl Wants a Guy...

who hugs her,
when they're watching a scary movie

who gives her his jacket,
even when he himself is feeling cold

who will always be the one,
to make her laugh

who will never complain &
never stare at other women

who will be romantic &
not scared to say "I love you"

most importantly,
he will love her for who she is...


and that guy, is what google calls

'NO RESULTS FOUND'

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Girls profiles taken from shaadi . com

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Ultimate.... .........
....I bet u can't stop laughing.

These are Girls profiles taken from shaadi . com These are actual ads on a matrimony site.
Grammar and spelling errors have no place in a profile description as everything is straight from the heart!

Disclaimer : I am not responsible if you forget your basic grammar after reading this mail...

~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~




- Hello To Viewers My Name is Sowmya , I am single i dont have male,If any one whant to marrie to me u can visite to my
home. I am not a good education but i working all field in bangalore.. if u like me u welcome to my heart...
when ever u whant to meet pls visit my resident or
send u letter..
Thanks
yours Regards Sowmya ~*~
~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~




i want very simple boy. from brahmin educated family from Orissa state she is also know about RAMAYAN, GEETA BHAGABATA, and other homework
(Wut Homework?)
~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~




I am a happy-go-lucky kind of person. Enjoys every moments of life. I love to make friendship. Becauese friendship is a
first step of love. I am looking for my dreamboy who will love me more than i.
Because i love myself a lot. If u think that is u then why to late come on ........hold my hand forever !!!
(The dilwale dulhaniya effect)
~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~




i am simple girl. I have lot of problemin my life because of my lucknow i am looking one boy he care me
and love me lot lot lot
(I don't know why but this is one of my favorites)
~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~




i want a boy with no drinks if he wants he can wear jeans in house but while steping out of house he should give recpect to our cast
(by not wearing his jeans? Wat the hell...)
~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~




HYE I AM A GOOD LOKING GIRL,WHO HAS THE CAPABILITY TO MAKE ANY BODY TO LOUGH.I BELIEVE IN GOD AND ACCORDING TO ME FRIENDS ARE THE REAL MESSENGER OF GOD. THE 3 THINGS I AM LOOKING FROM A BOY
,THEY ARE
1.THEY MUST BELIEVE IN GOD.
2. THEY HAVE TO LIKE MY PROFFESION
3. THEY SHOULD NOT GET BORED WITH ME WHEN I WILL TRY
TO MAKE THEM LOUGH.
(all of us are loughing {laughing})
~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~




whatever he may be but he should feel that he is going to be someone groom and he must think of the future life if he is toolike this he would be called the man of the lamp
(I am clueless, I feel so lost. Can anyone tell me what this girl wants)
~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~




i love my patner i marriage the patner ok i search my patner and I love the patner ok thik hai the patner has a graduate
ok
(I am again clueless but I liked the use of "ok". The person is suffering from "Ok-syndrome")
~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~




iam pranati my family histoy my two brother two sister and father & mother sister completely married
(somebody please explain in comments section how to get married 'completely' ?)
~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~




my name is farhanbegum and i am unmarried. pleaes you marrige me pleaes pleaes pleaes pleaes pleaes pleaes pleaes
(height of desperation! J )
~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~




iam kanandevi. i do owo businas.one sistar.he was marred.
(No comments)
~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~







hello i am a good charactarised woman. i want to run my life happily. i divorced my first husband. his charactor is not good'.
i expect the good minded and clean habits boy who may be in the same caste or other caste accepted ...
(but credit cards not accepted..?? ?)
~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~




Iam Sharmila my colour is black, but my heart is white. i like social service.
(Zebra..???)
~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~

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What Woman Want in Man at different Ages?

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What Women Want in Men

1. Handsome
2. Charming
3. Financially successful
4. A caring listener
5. Witty
6. In good shape
7. Dresses with style
8. Appreciates finer things
9. Full of thoughtful surprises
10. An imaginative, romantic lover
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Revised List (age 32):
1. Nice looking (prefer hair on his head)
2. Opens car doors, holds chairs
3. Has enough money for a nice dinner
4. Listens more than talks
5. Laughs at my jokes
6. Carries bags of groceries with ease
7. Owns at least one tie
8. Appreciates a good home-cooked meal
9. Remembers birthdays and anniversaries
10. Seeks romance at least once a week

Revised List (age 42):
1. Not too ugly (bald head OK)
2. Doesn't drive off until I'm in the car
3. Works steady ” splurges on dinner out occasionally
4. Nods head when I'm talking
5. Usually remembers punch lines of jokes
6. Is in good enough shape to rearrange the furniture
7. Wears a shirt that covers his stomach
8. Knows not to buy champagne with screw-top lids
9. Remembers to put the toilet seat down
10. Shaves most weekends

Revised List (age 52):
1. Keeps hair in nose and ears trimmed
2. Doesn't belch or scratch in public
3. Doesn't borrow money too often
4. Doesn't nod off to sleep when I'm venting
5. Doesn't re-tell the same joke too many times
6. Is in good enough shape to get off couch on weekends
7. Usually wears matching socks and fresh underwear
8. Appreciates a good TV dinner
9. Remembers my name on occasion
10. Shaves some weekends

Revised List (age 62):
1. Doesn't scare small children
2. Remembers where bathroom is
3. Doesn't require much money for upkeep
4. Only snores lightly when asleep
5. Remembers why hes laughing
6. Is in good enough shape to stand up by himself
7. Usually wears clothes
8. Likes soft foods
9. Remembers where he left his teeth
10. Remembers that its the weekend
Non $top Entertainment only at Funzug! Click to Join 4 Free!

Revised List (age 72):
1. Breathing
2. Doesn't miss the toilet

 

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Single Boy & Girl Monthly Milestones

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MONTHLY MILESTONES of a Single Boy

Heading First Week Second Week Third Week Fourth Week a) Bank Balance 20000 2000 200 20 b) Conveyance Auto ("I can afford it") Share Auto ("I would like to share. I am selfless!") Bus ("Public figures should travel by public transport") Walk ("Good for health") c) Girl Friends Eena , Meena & Tina ("I can BUY love") Meena &Tina ("I have enough girl friends") Tina ("I am loyal to her") "Huh! There is no pure love on earth!" d) Mobile Maintenance Frequent outgoing calls ("This is what mobile is invented for") Restricted outgoing calls ("I should not create unnecessary traffic on mobile lines") Rare outgoing calls (" Mobile should be used in urgent situations only") Only incoming calls ("I am not going to call her until she calls me") e) Boozing "Come, let's go to Goa and freak out! "Man, there is nothing in Goa . Let's go to Mysore .." "The best place to booze on earth is our house itself. What say?" "Drinking is injurious to health." MONTHLY MILESTONES of a Single Girl Heading First Week Second Week Third Week Fourth Week a) Bank Balance 20000 20000 20000 20000 b) Conveyance Auto ("after all my boy friend pays for it") Auto ("after all my boy friend pays for it") Auto ("after all my boy friend pays for it") Auto ("after all my boy friend pays f or it") c) Boy Friends Abhinav , saleem, Peter Sachin, sumeet, vinay Abhijeet, Ram, christopher. .. Arun , Saket, vimal.. d) Mobile Maintenance Only Incoming calls (Its for ppl 2 call me) Only Incoming calls (Its for ppl 2 call me) Only Incoming calls (Its for ppl 2 call me) Only Incoming calls (Its for ppl 2 call me) e) Boozing "Come, let's go to Goa "Come, let's go to Kulu "Come, let's go to Shimla "Come, let's go to darj ee ling

 

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You Would Be My ...

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If I were a painter......

you would be my painting,

if i were an author.....

! you would be my story,

if i were a poet.....

you would be my poem,

 












UNFORTUNATELY







I'm a Programmer...

and you are my BUG

ha ha ha ha ha ha ha.......  

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